Malalanje Dance troupe

In April last year death created the Pamaliro Patakatidwe and harshly imposed it on the Manyasa people. And going by the Manyasa land democratic creation the people were commanded “thou shall neither touch nor rebuke anything in the malalanje colours.”

So the story goes, most men lost their brains save for one young igwe who after drinking from the tree of wisdom realised that he still had his brains with him. This should be the fruit that most of the men in the manyasa kingdom need to be drinking because it has proved to be the right brain restoration therapy. As a manyasa citizen who is on a “payroll” ha ha ha! I can without fear or favour now declare that this young igwe be called King Solomon Jr, aliponso wina?

There are so many stories that I can tell about this Manyasa land. They have a leader who is after destroying everything about them. All she loves are malalanje. Her followers love malalanje too. In fact they are just malalanje in everything. They talk malalanje, think malalanje, walk malalanje, sleep malalanje and that’s enough for shouts of Chiwongolero amayi because they are so intoxicated with malalanje.

This manyasa land is full of malalanje drunken masters in the Pamaliro Patakatidwe to be precise, jam-packed with liars, thieves, crooks, womanisers, drug addicts, blood suckers, mafias, maskini, foul mouthed lunatics, the list is endless. You dare question their activities you will be finding yourself bundled in a police van on the road to area 300. They don’t care how old you are, they will be sending an 80 year old mapulisa officer to deal with a 23 year old young man, parading him as the author of some useless letter that proclaimed the resignation of Her Mandasillency the queen from awa ndiwo madzi.

In this Manyasa land we have so many stand-up comedians, just take a look at how babies are now fighting to make themselves very important. They are joining the kingship race with what they are calling “Agenda for chenje,” travelling across the land sounding to be men enough who can stand on their own, make decisions on their own, walk on their own ndi zina zotelo, but just try to touch them, or even scratch them a little bit eeeeh, they will cry all the way to their Dad. I guess the Dad is also the one who changes the nappies of this baby.

Kwalero tilekeze kaye pomwepa, nanga ndatchula dzina la muntu ine? Ndatha ine wanu mnyamata wa pa payroll.