Greetings to KK our VP: tikukadya ndalama za misonkho ku sand festival ife.

If you ask me to describe a Civil Servant for you I would tell you that a civil servant is that miserable man in town, who dresses shabbily and is not expected to own a house, car or run any business at all. Doing so would mean having “unexplained wealth” according to Malawi’s standards therefore the ACB, Police and the Financial Intelligence Unit will be breathing heavily on your neck because you deserve to be bundled in a police Land Cruiser, having your house searched and thrown into jail because you have committed a crime.

Not that I am trying to justify the looting of public resources, no, but am just trying to look at this episode with different lenses. The question being whispered heavily in my mind is; which one is explained wealth and which one is unexplained wealth? 

For example what do you call this? I remember very well sometime back I was asked to attend a press conference somewhere in town to do with football. The one addressing the media was a certain big business guy from Lilongwe. This man is well known for sponsoring some football activities and he is extremely rich. But what amazes me is that this big man is somebody who cannot utter a simple word in English and I hear he struggles to read or write but he is such a big guy in the capital. 

At the press briefing he had come with a blue plastic bag that contained huge sums of money and he told us that he was carrying K3 million in that bag. According to him this was money he had collected from some of his customers in Limbe. Is this explained or unexplained wealth?

Where did this man get all the money to turn into a business tycoon? 

To us having explained wealth is where somebody who is working for a bank that bombards us with so many charges simply for keeping our money where for you to get a loan you will be greeted with an unexplained interest but be assured that the gentleman who heads that bank at the end of the year will be pocketing close to K50 million in bonuses. This to us is explained wealth. Forget about how that bank makes its money, how they are reaping customers off their money and all that. As long as he pockets K50 million we are okay with it and we call him a big man.

Explained wealth is where a cabinet minister gets into government driving a Toyota corolla but barely two months in office he now owns 3 houses, the car in town, Toyota Fortuner, a Pajero, 3 pickups, 5 Lorries and other property. Remember he gets not more than K800, 000, but to us that’s explained wealth and the police can’t do anything about it.

Let’s take a look at these parastatals, how the CEOs there are owning mansions in town, driving posh cars, changing concubines at will, throwing parties and splashing money to these small small girls. The police are okey with it; the ACB can’t even investigate them and this Financial Intelligence chanichani can’t even make steps against them because this is “explained wealth”. Oh my God!

Have I mentioned the president here? We all know the stories about Bakili Muluzi, now allegations about Bingu, as for Joyce Banda we don’t need to be told the stories because we are able to see for ourselves. This again can be categorised as unexplained wealth (writing wile laughing)

If a civil servant dares to take to the streets asking for better perks he becomes an agent of the opposition sent by Peter Mutharika to fight amayi. Why? Because this is a person who is destined for misery.  

My point is, as we are sweeping the civil service of corruption and theft; let’s not neglect other systems that are prone for abuse. It’s not only the civil service that is rotten, even the private sector and other public sectors stink of corruption and theft, only that they seem to be very big people that can’t be touched. Tawapezelela ma accounts assistant omwewatu ndithu. 

By the way, greetings to the Vice President Khumbo Kachali. Let’s meet at the Sand Festival in Lilongwe, tikukadya money ya misonkhotu ife kumeneku, mwatilira.

MBC for us all.. give Uladi Mussa a black out I need to watch football.

Last evening I was in town, getting myself soaked to the September rains wondering if this could be attributed to effects of climate change or one of the malformations of nature. Then I received a phone call from a friend asking me if I was home and watching MBC TV, I said no. The friend told me that the broadcaster had just covered in its news bulletin the DPP rally in Masintha. 

Just seconds after the call it was now text message from another text message. These were friends informing me that they just watched Professor Peter Mutharika on MBC TV. I said wow that must be exciting. Then the social media was awash with the “bravo MBC for opening up” messages. Again I said wow this is interesting. Unfortunately due to my tight television watching schedule, when I arrived home my interest was in the USA with events on the historic Government shut down, I couldn’t gamble switching on MBC TV.

To me the news that MBC has opened up or is trying to open up (whatever is the right way of putting it) is commendable but there is need to consolidate this development and take other necessary steps to make sure that MBC achieves a full status of a public broadcaster as enshrined in the Communications Act. It’s sickening to note that it has taken the country 22 years since the MBC Act of 1964 was amended in 1991 for us to finally start opening up the airwaves of MBC.

In fact we were not even supposed to be debating MBC because the communications act under section 87 directs that MBC in its provision of broadcasting services must function independently without any political bias, support the democratic process and have regard to the public interest.

In my view, all politicians in Malawi need to take the blame for failing Malawians on MBC. There is no need for “Bravo JB” here. Just go to MBC and see the politics within the corridors. You will hear of reporters being banned to cover presidential functions simply because they are believed to be blue or green instead of orange. People enjoying some favours because of a colour they are believed to be promoting than others. So the opening up should also bring with it a broom to take away all the political dirt that has clouded MBC for years.

Am longing for a time when I will be able to watch the TNM Super league game live instead of being forced to watch the president laying a foundation stone at some bus depot in Mangochi. Gees! That stone is for the people of Mangochi not for all of us. Why spending my tax money beaming such a function on a national TV? Who cares anyway? I need to watch football, netball and other programs live not watch Uladi Mussa and his bad mouth atakhutakhuta misonkho yathu nkumaphunzitsa ana athu kutukwana pa TV. As if that is not enough, there is always a repeat after the 8pm news.

 To me opening up MBC means giving us news as it is not watching a PP Member of Parliament (or DPP, MCP or belonging to any other party) launching a football trophy in his area instead of updating us on the Mphwiyo shooting episodes as they progress. It just feels like we are still leaving under one party rule where MBC was there to talk about Kamuzu and MCP, nobody else. Apart from the news clip that had the DPP leader or this other day the MCP leader, it’s all about JB around the clock. 

Let me put it clear here that this is not about JB, it’s about whoever seats at state house. We don’t need too much of you on TV, period!

Let MBC follow up stories like this one where we heard that there is no maize in most admarc depots; let them cover the depletion of maize in our maize silos. Let them carry interviews that are criticising the current administration not the “so and so have commended Government” stories, of course we are talking about well balanced stories where all sides are given the platform to be heard.  

As we surely have shown commitment in this let’s not forget the fact that there is the Communications act weighing heavily on the shoulders of MBC where the Director General is answerable to the Minister of Information. Adding on that Section 90 of the act clearly states that the Board of MBC is appointed by the President. MBC can open up yes but we still have got the hand of a politician somewhere controlling events. That hand needs to be chopped off. We can’t be talking about the very same things over and over again. MBC runs on our taxes not on the bills of any politician. It is the duty of MBC to advance the encouragement of free and informed opinion on all matters of public interest, respect for human rights, the rule of law and the constitution of Malawi.

Gaba Malawi's Samuel Et'o? Nah, call him dull and a cheat..

The news that is in town is about Gabadinho Mhango. At the moment it seems like Gaba is the only player who is enjoying massive publicity in the media. If he is not cheating on his age then he is having problems to score during his JCE exams. Without roving up and down with the truth, Gaba is so dull and is a cheat, atleats my conclusion is based on facts.

Now there is a heated debate as to why this JCE issue is becoming a hot topic, the reason is simple when Gaba was writing his JCE it was news all over. His timetable was splashed in the papers and it generated a lot of excitement because a lot of people including his family, Big Bullets club, FAM and all of us had commented that the boy needed to take his books seriously before his football career.

I remember very well there were a lot of foreign teams that had shown interest to sign the player but the deals never went through. The reasons given were “Gaba apange kaye school”. 

Gaba had on so many occasions snubbed the national team call up because we were made to believe that “he was concentrating on his studies”. For example this other day he didn’t report for camp because he was writing his midterm exams and Coach Kinnah Phiri wasn’t amused at all. In other words as a country we were all waiting to hear what might come from Chichiri Secondary School. We remembered how Gaba came to watch his team draw against Namibia on June 5 at Kamuzu Stadium. He had just finished writing one of his JCE papers.

After noticing lack of fire power upfront during the game, there were calls for the coach to recall Gab for the Kenya game which was scheduled for the other week. The game was coming a day after the boy was sitting for his last paper. It was also reported that the coach had arranged special training sessions for Gaba only. As you can see, we all wished Gaba well but the boy doesn’t have the mind for education.

I have seen people commenting that education and football don’t go together. There are examples of players such as Samuel Eto who are millionaires but never made it in class. Trust me the Samuel Eto example cannot be applied to the Malawian context where our players as good as Josephy Kamwendo can only attract clubs from Mozambique pompa pokwelera kabazapa. They go to South Africa only to be dumped in the Mvela League, if they are lucky they will be signed by a PSL side but chances are that after 1 or 2 seasons they will be relegated to the bench before being offloaded completely. We have so many examples I don’t need to list them here.

Look here; we have seen Players that we all thought had travelled a lot to at least have something to show for it but where are they? Remember the story of Chancy Gondwe? The guy after all the years of playing in South Africa he couldn’t even afford 30 thousand kwacha to enrol at a Theological college in Lilongwe. Should I tell the story of Grant Lungu here? Had it been that he had the papers I believe he could have hanged up his boots and start searching for a job elsewhere. We have Phillip Madinga who is heading FDH bank, do you remember him? He was playing football but he never hesitated to take his books seriously. Apart from the likes of Phillip Madinga, Water Nyamilandu there are few players that have decent jobs after hanging their boots. Why? They don’t have the papers. Football in Malawi doesn’t pay and the standards have gone down that we can’t even produce a Samuel Eto from here, never, not in this generation.

Let me take you to Liberia, I guess we all can remember how George Weah failed to make it as president despite being popular because he did not have the papers. This forced him to go back to school for him to realise his ambition of becoming Liberia’s next president.

If we commend our players for dodging books in favour of football what kind of message are we giving to some young players who are at Primary School and are eyeing to become another Gaba? 

Having said all this let me point out that as a nation we realy need to take the blame also for spoiling this boy. We made him become the Eto we are talking about when he was miles away.

The return: Peter Mutharika's communication skills under the microscope part 1.

“People who do not have the talent to speak can be wonderful communicators”, Kevin Hogan. He says it is difficult to effectively communicate if you do not know what you want in the communication. This is where I am having problems to fully understand the debate in town about Arthur Peter Mutharika and his communication skills.

I have been following Peter Mutharika on his campaign trail and analysed the core message of his 2014 comeback bid. In Peter Mutharika I have seen a man who is so passionate about Malawi. I have listened to a man who knows what he is talking about. A man who opens up his mouth to speak only when it’s necessary. He is so brief and straight to the point. 

Talking about his leadership skills; Peter Mutharika has demonstrated his leadership skills in the way he has managed to put together the DPP and make it become the likely party that is poised to form the next government come 2014. After the death of Bingu in April last year, DPP was written off, people jumped ship but Peter Mutharika lived by his words at Ndata “sindikusiyani, I was born here and I will die here”.

During the time of Bingu, Peter Mutharika was overshadowed by some of the lows of his brother. Now that he has to carry himself without any shadows of his brother, the evidence is laid bare on the ground for all to see; a complete leader who is queuing to becoming Malawi’s next president and this is slowly becoming a reality. 

On the same, I have come to realise that those that are intoxicated with Fanta orange are the ones who are having problems to comprehend his messages because they are used listening to some folklores and the “ine ndikuti ine” pronunciations by amayi. Besides, their “amayi” has this ear-splitting and irritating voice that has the potential of damaging your eardrum. I am not surprised that all orange sympathisers have problems in getting right what Peter Mutharika says. They all have got damaged eardrums.

Imagine listening to this;

“Amayi ndi abambo ine ndinali ku chikwawa, kumeneko ndinali mu nyumba ya amayi ujeni awa, ndiye anandikhazika pachiujeni ichi. Inetu pano ndagula mabulangete ndipo ena akubweletsa anthu, nkhalamba mmidzimu muzifunda. Inu mukumudziwa Estere Jekete inu? Ine mayi ake ndakumana nawotu ku Ndirande. Iwe Skeffa Chimoto tayima ndikupatse moni, iwetu umayimba bwino, wandikumbutsa malemu a bamboo anga”

Then you listen to this;

“Lake Malawi belongs to Malawi. The issue of the lake is not negotiable because it’s ours. You don’t negotiate with people that have come to your house to steal from you. You protect your property by being tough, standing up to them as a real man”.

Which one of the two statements makes sense? Peter Mutharika is somebody who wastes no time by going straight to the point. He knows Malawians are suffering therefore all they want is to hear that message of hope. Malawians have got no time to listen to folklores. Malawi is not a kindergarten  

The choices we make..

Malawians are paying heavily for making bad choices over years. There is great need for us to have an understanding of how our choices have consequences. The unwise choices we have made are completely derailing our best-developed goals as a country and destroying everything about us. 

This is where I have argued that it’s not fair to expect a lot from Joyce Banda’s rule, because she is a product of bad choices; in fact she is a bad choice herself. If there is a list of bad choices that Bingu made in his time then the choice of Joyce Banda as running mate must be included on it. No wonder JB herself has been telling us that she never knew and expected that she would be picked as Bingu’s running mate in 2009. In other words, Joyce Banda had never dreamt of becoming president of Malawi, she had never aspired to becoming one or harboured those ambitions in her life time, hence the excitement where ever she goes.

You will see the Obama handshake excitement and all the noise about Bill Clinton visiting Malawi, appearing in life style magazines, getting honorary degrees, being the first one to introduce the “kukhala mzimayi sichifukwa” slogan, the usual “ine ndikuti”, “ine ndinapanga” “ine ndi ine” stories.

To say the truth nobody expected to hear her name being mention anywhere near the presidency. I was at the MEC offices myself when the presidential candidates were presenting their nomination papers. We were all glued to MBC radio one to hear news coming in from Sanjika. When it was announced on radio that Bingu and Joyce Banda were riding the open Rand Rover together from Sanjika, there was silence at MEC, I saw confused faces around the blue family. They all knew a bad choice was made.

Facts are there for all to see. Ever since JB became president in April last year, she has been making bad choices all the way because she is also a bad choice and a product of a bad choice. From the choice of her cabinet ministers to the choice of policies to implement. Nothing seems to make sense. The only thing that makes sense is the the name President.

Joyce Banda rushed to make decisions without calculating the costs. The recycled politicians who are only concerned with personal gains are in charge of the country’s affairs. They messed up Bingu’s time and now they are busy doing the same with her. All the people around our president are flatters. 

Look around and you will see our president, If she is not being a puppet of the west then she is busy making bad choices of becoming a facebook addict who is seen posing for facebook everywhere she goes.

Since the attainment of democracy 20 years ago we as people of Malawi have been making bad choices as individuals or collectively. Our leaders have invariably turned out to be more concerned with self aggrandizement and material gain than with the development of available national resources for the benefit of us all and these leaders were chosen by us. They have been giving us literally nothing, no mfundo no whatsoever but we ended up voting for them. We were just following their charisma.

Let me take you through the bad choices we have made; the “lost decade” of Bakili Muluzi was a result of a bad choice we collectively made in 1994. We chose a politician not a leader. That is the reason why we had uncontrolled levels of corruption, we had a young pioneer like thugs who were notoriously branded as young democrats and were all over town causing terror. The atcheya bambo slogan, anyamata a patown, kuchitekete were enough to make us clap hands to this man. 

Then came the time of Bingu from 2004. We were so close to making probably one of the wisest decisions ever in 2009 when we gave Bingu a landslide after we got swayed with his first five years in office. Never did we know that some bad decisions will be made along the way.

2014 is probably a litmus test for our democracy. Malawians have a chance to voting into power leaders that mean well to our democracy or leaders that are committed to democracy in rhetoric only.

We have tried and seen some of them. What they have for Malawi is ng’ombe, ufa, posing for facebook, jet obsession, Uladi Mussa, lies, elevation of chiefs, insulting and fighting dead people, property grabbing, training our youths to be bad mouthing others, plundering our tax money as a result of senseless traveling ndi zina zotelo at a time when Malawians want jobs, food, decent houses, drugs at the hospital, potable water, roads, opportunities to make money,  good education ndi zina zotelo.